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Flirting is the way most people determine whether
or not a member of the opposite sex is interested in them.
Following is a quick outline on how you should go about the complex,
sometimes fun, sometimes not so fun, task of flirting. It
all beings with your approach.
The Approach
One person approaches the other. They move into closer physical
proximity. This much is clear: NO approach equals NO possibility
of initiating contact. You must approach!
Example:
A woman sits down next to a man in a coffee shop, or a man stands
near a woman in a dance club. This is the first step.
Once you approach, you begin looking for the signs.
The Signs
The person who has been approached will
always signal the other's presence in some way a sign. This signal
is not like a train whistle, however, more a subtle body language
which you can learn to recognize. For example, he or she simply
may look up, move over to make room, nod slightly, or signal with
a glancing eye contact.
A display of total obliviousness
to the one who is approaching generally indicates lack of interest
altogether. Don't be discouraged. But if the one you
approached shows absolutely no interest, then it's time to re-group
and try again. But let's say the approach works. You
have your positive acknowledgement, now what? Time to talk
The Verbal Exchange
The two people
may then engage in a mild verbal exchange about impersonal, unimportant
matters such as the weather or the scene around them. The
key word here is MILD.
This is the classic place for the
clever “line," but cleverness is not required. At this point,
a verbal exchange is not for the purpose of sharing valuable insights
about life or determining philosophical compatibility. It is just
a vehicle to further the developing contact.
Examples: Verbal
overtures might include anything from “please pass the pickles"
to “your looking great tonight", to “have you seen the waitress?".
Without some form of verbal response, it is highly unlikely that
the next step will occur. Let's say all is going as planned.
Time for body language.
Body Language
Over a period of time, a couple that has begun to talk may also
begin to orient themselves physically to one another, to turn toward
one another until, if all is goes well, they are fully facing one
another. This is your goal.
This step can take minutes
or hours . . . or weeks or months . . . to achieve. Yet, without
this physical reorientation toward one another, not very much can
ever happen, so give up on people who turn their back toward you
for long periods of time! But if they don't
Touching
The woman or the man (most often the woman)
touches the other in a light, fleeting way. Examples: A couple might
accidentally brush their hands against one another while reaching
for a drink, or the woman might pat the man on the arm in the middle
of a shared joke. The exchange of very subtle, almost glancing touches
may continue for some while, and if all goes well, can escalate
into the casual affections shown by couples who are dating.
If you've reached this point, then flirting has now become the beginning
of a relationship. The Art of Flirting should always end with
the beginning of a relationship. Now get out there and flirt.
The Art of Flirting is really the Art of making first contact.
You only have one shot at making a great first impression.
By following some of the guidelines we've established in this article,
you should now be equipped to locate, approach, and ascertain whether
or not your subtle flirting has opened the doors to a new and exciting
relationship.
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| My name is Joe Vetromile, and I'm an author/screenwriter
living in So. California. I've written hundreds of articles
on the subjects of flirting, dating and breaking-up. Besides
having first hand experience with all three, my research on the
art of dating confirms to me that while the ritual of hooking up
with a soul-mate may be arduous at times, the end result of finding
that perfect someone to share the rest of your life with, is well
worth the effort.
Joe Vetromile writes for DrDating , a web
site for anyone looking for love online. We have hundreds of articles,
E-Books and links to some great dating and love sites all over the
world. DrDating also offers reviews of some of the most popular
dating sites and books.
http://www.DrDating.com/
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